Journal & Topics Media Group

Maureen Pekosh: Welcome — Don’t Penalize — Transgender Individuals


After a random discussion with my twenty-something son, I realized I have been shielding myself from a stark reality. After reading that District 225 discussed adopting a transgender policy, I didn’t give it much thought. None of my kids ever discussed any transgender students while attending GBS. Never having, to my knowledge, met a transgender individual, I didn’t give the situation a local transgender student might face much thought. I never considered the GBS population including transgender students. Luckily, the high school district board is much more forward thinking. Residents attending a board meeting where this policy was shared seem to agree with my revised thinking.

Parents often want to know a child’s sex as soon as possible. They can find out a child’s sex while the child is still in vitro. They paint walls pink or blue, buy dresses or pants, dolls or trucks based on this information. I have been guilty of this mindset. When my daughter was born, we had been expecting a son. I did not own a feminine baby item to dress her in. When family came to visit me in the hospital, I requested they bring me something “appropriate” to dress her in for her homecoming. All my life I have been making assumptions about people based on their assigned sex at birth. Never having felt in conflict about this fact of life, I have made many misassumptions about the lives of possibly 700,000 other people. Yet as someone who understands being different against one’s will, my errors are relevant for any individual who might find themselves uncomfortable with this proposed policy.

My enlightened son brought up the gender spectrum in our discussion. That got my attention. I had always assumed there were two genders. I had never previously considered the in-between phase of gender identity. Assigned sex is based on hormones, chromosomes, biology, and appearances. People can look one way, but think and act another. Gender has multiple components. People think one way, identifying themselves somewhere on the gender spectrum. They express themselves by how they dress, the way they speak, the way they carry their body. When these three do not align in the traditional sense, difficulties may arise.

I know how complicated it has been for my daughter to attend school as a diabetic. She faced several unique challenges and misconceptions because she needed to prick her finger drawing blood multiple times a day, take shots throughout the day, and monitor whatever she ate or drank. While she was a primary-grade student, our state passed laws to protect and assist her. But having diabetes did not change how she thought about herself. She did not allow it to identify her. High school is difficult enough for youth having to fit in, select classes geared toward an uncertain future, getting good grades, making friends, and steering clear of trouble. Not feeling the gender one appears to be complicates everything.

Having survived a stroke, I sometimes feel very isolated. Day to day I do not often encounter anyone else who must think “lift toe, bend ankle, take step with left foot every time” before they walk. Thinking about something as simple as walking makes my life more complicated. Even the people who know me best don’t always understand my situation. I assumed living with my personal limitations had made me more empathetic. Perhaps I was too focused on my own debility to think about others. I cannot begin to imagine how isolating it might be for a local high school student who is transgender.

I want to be noticed for what I accomplish, what I say, what I choose to do. I do not want to be judged by what I can no longer do or what I no longer do well. I spend a dedicated amount of time addressing my deficits but I still need assistance. I take advantage of handicap parking. Although there were times, when my daughter could not participate in her chosen sport because of diabetes playing havoc with her blood sugar, she strove to be an outstanding athlete. Usually her talent triumphed but when diabetes held her back, there were laws protecting her from discrimination. My daughter and I desperately needed those laws that aid and protect us. A student’s “consistently asserted gender identity when it is a sincerely held part of the student’s core identity” needs to be protected in the same way.

In Illinois it is illegal to discriminate against a person based on gender. This Illinois law encompasses public schools. It is up to our district to follow the law. Having a policy on transgender students does that. Diabetes and stroke survival look different from person to person, but there are still general practices put in place that help safeguard people with both. Being transgender cannot be defined unilaterally either. Policies that preserve a student’s right to choose and express that choice, privacy, safety, participation, socialization, and protection from ostracism lessen the chances that a student will sue our district for not treating them fairly because of their gender expression.

Last month, Palatine High School was sued by a student who claimed the school was not letting her use the girls’ locker room for PE classes. The student has identified as a girl for the majority of her high school education. The ACLU stated that the high school does not have a policy allowing transgender students to use appropriate locker rooms. Appropriate means compatible or suitable. The issue seems to be should a student be allowed to define with what they feel compatible or should administration make this judgement based on appearances?

GBS has prided itself on being a safe place. To be considered safe, the high school must be a place where students feel comfortable being themselves. It must be a place where students can focus on academics rather than defending their right to use a specific locker room or restroom. When my daughter was young, diabetes restricted her ability to be in the classroom at certain times, to attend field trips, and to fully participate in sports. Proper education of the pertinent individuals and a state law changed that. My daughter cannot control her blood sugar. She should not be penalized for this. If biology, psychology, and environment rather than choice leave a student feeling like they are living in the wrong body, they should not be penalized either.

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